Hello there.

I've been really busy lately just studying for my midterms and so much papers to write. theres literally only 2 more weeks of spring 2010 left and one week of finals. isn't that crazy how time flies! I'm done with all of my midterms until finals but i have LOADS of papers/presentations/research to do BEFORE the 2 weeks is over. i'm going to have a rough week next week and the week after as well. Let's hope i can finish this semester strong. I've been working hard for my grades and trying to keep them up and trying all the different opportunities to bring up my grades by doing extra credit etc. I really really want a 3.0 for the semester grade so that my cumulative grade will go up as well. I don't want to settle for a C. I want either an A or a B! aiming high so that i can finish my undergrad career strong! This IS my last SPRING semester as an undergrad. its so crazy! I have some down time right now to write this cause i'm home and i'm an idiot for forgetting my book so i cna't do my homework. but anyways. after this semester is over i'm just looking forward to summer. I've applied to so many internships/jobs that I'm going crazy because I haven't received any phone calls back. I'm trying my best and I'm going crazy cause i have no replies. Oh well, i can focus more on school at this point than work.I just hope that i can find a good job/internship over the summer and not just a retail job because i want to be able to get some experience under my belt before i graduate because most if not all jobs are looking for people with experience in those fields/accounting experience. enough blab about my school life, even though it's officially taken over my life.. lol...

Okay so I applied for EDD because i got fired from my job for something really stupid. doesn't that suck?! yes it does but i have a phone interview on monday because they need to ask me a couple of questions. hopefully i do get EDD because i have so much bills to pay for and i've never NOT worked. this is actually the first. kinda crazy but yeah. like i've said before i've been applying but no response. maybe i'll apply to an unpaid internship if i do get approved for EDD. i'll ask them to see if it counts as a job if its an unpaid internship.. if it doesnt and i still continue to get EDD then i will do it just for experience. so LET'S PRAY THAT I GET EDD!!

bleghck. omicron went through a tough time this year but we are still strong. this just made us stronger and also tests us to see if we can get through the hole we are in. we are on to bigger and better things. it only goes up from here.

me and gee are great! we have been busy with school and stuff but we're still strong. beebee is GREAT. she is getting bigger and fatter but she is SOOO CUTE! i love her..

i went home early this week because i've had a rough and hectic week so far. plus this is my only "relaxation" if it is a relaxation before finals and all hte papers i have to write because I dont think I can go home next week because of my papers and projects etc.

i'm so stressed with everything and trying to get good grades, maintain good relationships with friends, try harder at school, try to get a job for the summer, try to get things done early so i don't procrastinate but that never happens. i'm so stressed and i can't wait until school is over this semester!

i hope that i get to do something fun this summer because the past couple of summers i've been at summer school or work and thats it. no vacations or having fun. it really sucks so i really hope that before i go into the real world, i have a really goooood summer. since next semester is my last semester, i want to be able to relax before the most hectic semester of my life.

ok i think this is all for now. i'll blog more later twhen i have more things to say i'm blanking out right now. k bye

So i haven't blogged in a really long time.. its cause i've been so busy with school and work. Anywho an update on my life. I'm so frustrated right now. for the past couple of days i really don't know what is going on.. iono school is stressing me out and everything else! sometimes i feel like i have no one to turn to at times like this. my heart hurts, my mind is going crazy, and i feel so unloved. i really like going home cause it takes me away from all the drama, the stress and everything else. my family really keeps me grounded and sometimes i just wanna move back home. i'm stressing out about whether or not i'm gonna find a roomate to live with after nicole is gone and if i can't, i'm moving out too. i'm stressing out that i'm not doing so well in my classes but i study so hard that i better be doing well. i stress out that my position in omicron gets fulfilled so that it's up to par with what is going on. i stress out about my relationship cause i don't get to see him that much and not seeing him gets me frustrated/upset/sad all at the same time which leads to our arguments. i don't know what to do with my life. i just want to put everything on pause and just relax but i feel like i have no time to do that. i can't go on vacation because i have no money and time to do it and i feel like the real world is getting closer and closer and i'm not gonna have time to do anything with my life. i dont know what to do and sometimes i just want to hide. at this point in my life, i'm getting really really stressed out.

no one really understands me and i feel all alone. i hide all my feelings cause i have no one to express it to. the only one that i would like to tell is always too busy or doing something else or seems like they don't have time for me anymore.

i'm hating where i am right now and i hate all this pain.

i wish that i could escape to the unknown and never be found.....